…and all else will fall in place!
1. Guidance: Seeking the higher power “faith” for guidance is always good! It’s the mind’s way of allowing yourself to process right or wrong, good and bad. Who knows us better than we know our self? The danger in this is talking yourself out of what you know is right or rationalizing bad! Trust your “gut” feeling. Humans are the best of God’s creation and he provided all we need to make the best decisions for our self!
2. Think before you speak. Your life and relationships are your business – and should be handled professionally, strategically and with maturity. Therefore if you don’t want people in your business – keep it to yourself. You are your best friend!
3. Support from family friends: It’s good to confide and seek support from the “right” family and friends and not all family and friends. Learn to accept advice graciously even if you have no intention of following it. At the same time don’t go to friends or family for every little relationship challenge because people will tune you out and they also bring their bias to their advice/opinions because of their experiences.
4. Release Anger: While anger is a natural emotion and defense mechanism – in matters of the heart or love (even with our children) we must learn how to channel that emotion to a more positive place in our mind, body and spirit. There is casualty between anger and stress or our “fight or flight responses”, which triggers a sequence of nerve cell firings and chemicals like adrenaline, noradrenalin and cortisol which are released into our bloodstream. These patterns of nerve cell firing and chemical releases cause our body to respond negatively and contributes to 80% of mental and physical illnesses. Don’t bring illness onto yourself.
5. Acknowledgment of our pain is key to healthy decision making. Acknowledgement helps us identify the source and tackle the solution. Remember solutions may also be painful, but it’s a process toward a better outcome.
6. Self Reflection reminds us of our imperfections! Yes, we are full of things people don’t like about us and we don’t like about our self. Self reflection helps us to live everyday toward self improvement.
7. Communication: Relationships are complicated! Communication between two people is the first step toward success and healing any relationship challenge. Don’t speak to anyone until you speak to the person who is involved in the relationship! If you ask straight questions, usually you will receive straight answers.
8. Humility: It’s God’s gift to women! Humility is viewed by some as “weakness”. Humility is a powerful demonstration of our ability to listen, to apologize, to understand another and to accept our own mistakes.
9. Learn to say no! You don’t have to save the world by yourself. It’s not an all or nothing proposition and life will go on. Simply do the best and be the best you can in any given day!
10: Take care of yourself. Yes, your mental & physical health should be your number one priority. Exercise and better nutrition are emerging as important treatments for stress, low self esteem and depression. If you feel bad emotionally, physically and mentally — you can do nothing to create happiness for others. A happy you, makes for a happy two-relationship!
Dr. Elisa English is Mental Health Professional with a Ph.D in clinical Social Work for the past 10 years. Dr. Elisa, also known as the Provocative Doctor, has built a practice that targets issues confronting many of the challenges that plague our society from suicide to depression. Her aim is to help people, particularly women and young girls, expand their inner beauty, strength and confidence.